in which I get yelled at for breastfeeding without a protective blanket
Today we went to the Garfield Park Conservatory. Zibby keeps calling it the Lavatory. “mom! Lets go to the lavatory gift shop!” They have free crafts and stuff for the kids. Today we made “hairy caterpillars” which is nylons filled with grass seed and soil and sectioned off with rubber bands. Supposably it will turn hairy (read: grassy) in 5 days at which point we could plant it or put it on a plate and watch it die off. ha ha.
We met friends there and were having a good time.
Until right before we left.
We had all gone to the bathroom, and were about to leave the conservatory, when we thought it might be good to sit and nurse our little ones before getting in the car. I was sitting in a chair, in the hallway outside the bathroom, just off the foyer entrance. There were two chairs and a bench. My friend was opposite me on the bench, and our older girls were playing nicely by us. I was nursing Henry and chatting with my friend, when a female security guard came across the foyer and yelled out to me, about did I have a blanket, and if I wanted to do “that” I had to get a blanket and cover up. I was utterly surprised and told her, no, I did not have a blanket and no, actually, I did not need one. She screeched that she could see my breast! I looked down. YES! I CAN SEE YOUR BREAST! She was pretty much yelling at me from about 12 feet away.
My friend, who was as shocked as I was, asked if there was a manager we could talk to, instead. The Security Guard said she was extremely happy to go find her. By the time the manager appeared, Henry was done nursing. First the manager asked my friend what was wrong, but Security Guard ran over and said it none of my friends business, it was all ME. THe manager turns to me. I said, well, I was just sitting her in this chair, nursing my son. THe manager said something to the effect of, I should understand the Guard was just protecting the other patrons and that it is a busy and public place. I looked around, it was empty, not busy at all! She told me that there were Professors (!) and children around. I told her that state law says that I can breastfeed anywhere I have the right to be, including this hallway. She told me that certainly I was allowed to feed my son, but that there were other areas in the conservatory that were better and more private. I said that I was just fine where I was and that it was inappropriate for the guard to reprimand me, and that furthermore, if discretion was the goal, then the guard shouldnt be yelling at me from across the foyer.
The manager left after that, but I dont feel encouraged at all that other breastfeeding mothers will be safe from being bothered there. At least by that guard. I had earlier nursed my son in several other areas of the conservatory, surrounded by other parents and children in the craft area, in full view of several other employees, with no problem.
Actually, in the 4 years Ive been nursing, Ive never ever been told I couldnt nurse or that I should move or anything, and Ive nursed all over, museums, restaurants, trains, stores, airplanes, etc. No one has ever said anything about me nursing my older child/toddler either, so, perhaps I have been lucky, but I was truly shocked and upset today. Getting yelled at and told I have to hide my breastfeeding was really unsettling. The guard seemed personally triggered by it, she was not polite or kind and did not even try to be nice about the way she asked me, well, no, she actually told me I HAD to cover up. Which I absolutely do not. Even if I was not being “discreet” whatever that means. I dont know a single breastfeeding mom who is out to flash anyone, for heavens sake. SO, I of course called several of my Conservatory-going friends and told them to make sure they exercise their right to breastfeed on the chairs near the lobby next time they go. 
FWIW, I am sure less of my breast is visible when I breastfeed my son than you can see on just about any woman who wears lowcut or tight shirts. Do they accost those women in the conservatory? No cleavage allowed, especially if there are Professors around. Honestly, the Professors might just die if they were to see a baby being fed normally. *(I just think its funny the manager cited “the Professors” as those who need to be protected from possibly seeing my baby breastfeed or catch a glimpse of my bosom.)
Filed under daily life | Comments (10)look what I made!
Today I was very productive.
I got the idea from an article in Quilting Arts Gifts. They turned out so well! I made a set of 6 mats and 6 napkins. The back of the mats are a dark green. It looks really cool with the turquoise quilting stitches and the purple binding. They are reversible. This set is for my Other Mother (Cate’s Mom) because she is always making me and the kids really cute things, purses, blankets, etc. I also made a sling:
This I just sort of “wung” it. Ha. I wanted it to be shorter than my New Native pouch and longer than my Kangaroo Korner. The fabric is a slightly stretchy and I love how it turned out. I had to find a tutorial online for french seams and trust that it would all work out, even though it made no sense to me at all. Of course, its far from perfect, but I am happy with it. I also found a museum pass at the library for Buzz and Zibby to go to the Nature Museum and see the butterflies. It involved 3 library visits, oh well. Tomorrow we are going to brunch with friends, which I just remembered about, so I ought to get off the puter and go to bed. Just wanted to brag about my sewing successes. Next up, more monkey pants, by request. :)
update
first photo is Zibby at 7 mos, then Henry at 7 mos.They definitely have a case of the “exactlys”. At 7mos, Henry is scooting and crawling army style everywhere, and fast. He wants to be wherever the action is, and that means Zibby. He makes tons of noises and can stay sitting up if you put him upright. He smiles all the time and laughs a lot, too. He likes to sleep in the sling and though we do mostly have him in a diaper, we catch a lot of his elimination signals and take him potty often. He nurses well and wants to hold and maul food, though he doesnt actually eat any of it. At 4 years, 2 months, Zibby is into being a dervish. She talks a lot, likes games, puzzles, tv, going to the zoo, playing with her brother, seeing friends, dancing, trying on clothes, cooking and eating, and did I mention talking? Pink is her favorite color. She doesnt love seatbelts or underwear or washing hair. She cracks us up all the time with her jokes and silly antics. She loves to make us laugh. Zibby is very sweet and wants to be friends with everyone, though sometimes she is a little shy. We are really lucky to have two beautiful, awesome kids. xxx
sew what?
I’ve totally been bitten by the sewing bug.I used this pattern to make some pants.I made an outfit on Friday for my friend’s daughter, Owl. It was for her first birthday, but I was totally inspired by this super cute owl pattern fabric I found. 
these are the pants I made from the online pattern. they turned out way better than the ones from the store bought pattern. and they were not difficult. I whipped these up in about an hour or maybe less.
I also bought a pattern for a blouse for me. I cant wait to make it.Tomorrow my plan is to hit the Hancock Fabric that is closing down (touhy and lincoln) early, and then drive out to the zoo. Its supposed to be gorgeous tomorrow and Zibby has been asking to see Zebras. And I have a free pass to ride the Safari bus. We’ll bring a picnic lunch, that we will no doubt supplement with french fries from the zoo and hopefully ride the merry go round. woo hoo.
home again, home again, jiggety jig
we made it home.
unfortunately, my dad’s flight from tokyo was canceled, so he did not make it back before we left, so we didnt get to see him except for the first night, when he picked us up from the airport. he did make it home today, so thats good.
miami was exceptionally nice, 80 and sunny every single day, except for one overcast day and a few thunderstorms at night. we spent time at Flamingo Park, a very nice and shady playground. Shady from trees, not citizens. We hit the beach at 21st street, and one day drove to Bill Baggs Cape Florida State Park in Key Biscayne, which was absolutely fantastic, if you dont count the giant multi child meltdown in the changing room after lunch. and I dont.
we also spent many hours in my dad’s pool, lounging around on floaties and playing games and eating each other’s raisins. Eating each other’s raisins involves pretending to pluck the wrinkled up pads of someone’s fingers and eating them. Perhaps this is just one of the many fun things Lisa came up with. I was lucky enough to have some friends be able to come stay with their kids to help us have fun.
and then there was some television viewing. We mainly watched tv in th e library, which is home to the house’s second largest tv, which is still massively large. though not as large as the wall mounted projection tv in the tv room. it was fun.
mostly we cooked in at the house, but there were a couple of attempts to eat out at restaurants. this was met with mixed success. one of the successes included my friend jill getting barfed on the car. if all else fails, lower your expectations. that’s what i always say.
anyway, it went much smoother than I expected. I have to say, that really, I put in a lot of preventive attention and really being present and going with the flow of things. The minute I tried to control things, it went wonky. The more I stayed present and aware and made good eye contact (thanks, Meli in Italy), the better things went. Of course, I had brought a whole suitcase of videos and books and toys, and really, we didnt use any of them. Zibby did do some sticker activity books and Henry played with his toys, but largely, we kept busy doing stuff outside and eating. Having nice warm weather was so important.
Ive missed going outside. Since Zibby doesnt like to wear warm clothes, and doesnt like being outside in winter, well, we’ve been cooped up since November.
Of course, it can still easily snow in April in Chicago, but one has to assume the winter is mostly gone and soon we will have Park Days and Beach Day and going to the Zoo and the Arboretum and hanging out in peoples yards. and pools. and going to tie dying parties. and picnics…. :) oh, before I forget, today Zibby invited me to a teaparty in her apartment (second bedroom). She told me mary and joe-ho (her imaginary friends) were busy making peach cake. Its very hard to make, she said, you need peaches, seaweed and yarn.
doesnt that sound delish?
Filed under daily life | Comment (1)still in florida
this is zibby relaxing at the beach on 21st street
henry and zibby in the pool
sibling cuddles on the bed
look at bub sitting up in a highchair! in line at the buffet, he reached over from his perch in the sling and grabbed a hunk of lettuce off my plate and shoved it in his mouth. at dinner he ate half a french fry and gnawed on some watermelon and a saltine. he is so grabby! and though he is still pretty much crawling on his tummy not hands and knees, he is FAST! and determined. he gets up and rocks on his hands n knees, though. and sort of pushes over on to his side to check stuff out. more pictures are on my camera, I emailed some from my phone.
the weather has been amazing so far. well, last night it stormed, but in the middle of the night. I had to wetvac the room under construction today. it is beginning to storm again, now. I hope its ok tomorrow because we have a little day trip planned.
last night zibby cut her thumb on a disposable razor while I was trying to nurse bub down. she realllllly freaked out about the blood. she did call me a good dr mommy though. we managed to get thru it and today she was better after I got some bandaids on it. she kept saying “I wish I was Bub” and “I wish Bub was hurt, not me” I know she meant that she didnt want to be hurt, not wishing hurt on bub. and she said “serenity now” a few times. I kept helping her breathe and keep calm until she fell asleep. Then bub was up until 2:30 am, then the storm…not a lot of sleep last night. So today we vegged by the pool and went out to dinner instead of cooking.
well, we will be home soon, we sure miss Buzz and our friends and our kittty.
love,
us
Filed under daily life | Comment (1)
